I Had a Bad Day

Today was Day 3 of the 31 Days To Clean Challenge and well I failed today.  Miserably failed.

I was neither a Martha or a Mary today and all around I’m just ready to go to bed and wake up tomorrow hoping for a better day.

See, a lot has been going on lately.  On top of my regular duties and being pregnant I have now taken on 2 puppies and my teenage brother.  Our finances are slim to none, our food is slim to none, and my patience was well…non existent today.

I have heard non-stop what everyone else in my house needs/wants/likes/dislikes.  “There’s nothing to eat” “I don’t want to eat that”  It’s been constant the dogs crying and needing constant attention plus trying to keep my regular schedule of activities with the boys plus trying to motivate my brother to get off of my couch.  I’ve been stretched thin.  All I’ve heard is how I need to do this, I need to go there, where’s my sandwich, when is dinner going to be done, can I have a drink and no one has asked me not one time if I needed something.  Even five minutes to take a shower no one has given me a chance to just breathe!

So needless to say I’ve been wearing pretty thin.  I was making sandwiches for lunch and Randy is going on and on about something he wants me to do and the dogs were crying in their kennels (I guess no one could see I was busy and let them out) Devyn started crying then Hayden was running around teasing the dogs and I just lost it.  I banged my fist on the counter and yelled.  I yelled at everyone.  My tantrum lasted about 5 minutes and then finally I told Randy to just go back to work and I went in my room and cried. Literally cried, I balled my eyes out for 10 minutes. 

I feel selfish saying that I just needed some peace.  I just needed some quiet someone to just be considerate enough to give me 5 minutes to think or to breathe.  Ugh…I felt so horrible.  After I cried I went out to my kids and hugged them both and apologized. I didn’t know what else to do.  They’ve never seen me like that and I felt so bad that they had to witness mommy having a weak moment.  Finally we all went and laid down for a nap.  I needed it. Even Hayden (my non-napper) fell asleep for an hour.  Of course I still had the teenager on the couch and the dogs yapping but I closed the door and we just laid there me and my boys for an hour it was quiet and I felt like I used to before the dogs and before the brother.

I had a better evening then I did for a day but needless to say I don’t think I conquered today’s goals.  I will try again tomorrow.

I’m not perfect and I know that. Pray for me!

Thanks for stopping by!

Jaymie